Job Interview …

Just down the hall from the argument clinic…

Applicant: “Hi, I’m here for a job interview”

Interviewer: “Yes, yes, very good. Sit down.” (pause while sitting) “OK, please stand” (another pause) “Hmm, yes, sit, please” (pause) “Now stand”

A: “Hold on, what’s all this?”

I: “Well, you are here for the job interview, and I need to see you are capable of standing and sitting.”

A: “So can we move on then?”

I: “Yes, of course. Please finish this rhyme: ‘Jack and Jill went up a hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down…”

A: “Er, what does this have to do with the interview?”

I: “Please, I’ll ask the questions. Can you finish the rhyme?”
A: “Of course I can”

I: “Well, then…do it.”

A: (sighs) “and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.”

I: “Very good, very good indeed” (scribbles on paper) “Now, please sing ‘God save the king'”

A: “What?”

I: “It is a well known song. Please sing it.”

A: “I don’t see the point.”
I: “You are here for an interview, correct?”

A: “Well yes, but what does this have to do with being an accountant”

I: (pause). “Well, everything, I guess.”

A: “Well this is silly; I shall have to look for work elsewhere.” (rises and leaves)

I: “Ah, was so promising in standing and sitting…”

…

Does this sound like any job interview you’ve ever had? No? Then GG guesses you never ran for public office. Especially the American presidency. To run for office, candidates must raise lots of money, must greet lots of people, must kiss babies, must give speeches over and over, approve advertisements, and must claim to do things that in fact the job by itself cannot do. And do this for years at a time, even when nominally working at some other job. And, you know, be somebody you’d like to have a beer with. And, as we recently saw, “debate” other candidates (which little resembles true debates) where victory or defeat can come down to … looking at your watch? Bad makeup? It is bonkers. You have to wonder how many potentially great presidents never even considered running…and for that matter, how many past great presidents would never have gotten elected.

Oh well. Maybe we get what we deserve with a system like this…